The One About Pink Floyd
June 22, 2005

hi kids,

cookie and i were talking about Pink Floyd, and she's JUST NOW understanding why Pink Floyd is SO AWESOME. and if you haven't gotten there yet, and you think Pink Floyd is overrated and lame? then i can't hear you. you're talking, but all i hear is "blah blah Pink Floyd blah blah." and don't even start in on the whole if-you-don't-smoke-drugs-then-Pink-Floyd-sucks thing. because really, i'm sure it's awesome, but it's not necessary, and anyone telling you otherwise is NOT ACTUALLY A PINK FLOYD FAN. so don't talk to them anymore.

i'm not going to deny that the members of the band were probably on all kinds of drugs when they wrote their songs. because, duh. have you ever listened to one of their songs? but, that doesn't mean you have to smoke drugs or shoot up drugs or inhale drugs through your nose or anus to enjoy Pink Floyd.

and just to prove my point, go back in time and ask the 6th grade me if i need to smoke drugs to "get" Pink Floyd.
let me save you some time, she won't talk to you because you're weird and you startled her, but if she would, she'd say, "no." and then she'd go back to playing her dad's albums on her Cabbage Patch Kids suitcase record player.
dad had Meddle, Wish You Were Here, Dark Side of the Moon, The Wall, and Animals on vinyl. and my brother and i used to listen to them a lot.
A LOT.

i think what my brother and i loved about the Floyd was that it was obvious that the band was talented musically, lyrically, and technically (as in being into technology)...because...all those sounds! and the lyrics? oh man. amazing! and when it's obvious to an 8 year old, i mean, c'mon.

now listen, i know that not every Pink Floyd song is a masterpiece and should appreciated by all, okay? in fact, i'd say a lot of their stuff is self-serving. i mean, come on, when one side of the album is one song? i'm looking at you, Echoes. (ha, what are you laughing at Allman Bros.? Whippin' Post indeed. we're all tied to the whippin' post when that song comes on the radio. yeah dad, i said it.)
and? i'm not such a Pink Floyd fan/snob that i won't admit that sometimes? sometimes when i'm listening to the classic rock station? and Money comes on? i've been known to change the station because, hello? there are other PF songs out there.

Dear Radio Stations,

There are other Pink Floyd albums besides Dark Side and The Wall, m'kay? perhaps you could purchase one?

Love,
Jaimie

i think what helped me fall in love with Pink Floyd when i was a kid was the album covers. they were so cool-looking and had the lyrics on them, and i would read or sing along with the record and think deep thoughts like, "what does he mean by his hands swelled up like two balloons? did they float, like with helium?" and "who is vera lynn?" and "what machine?" things like that. The cover for The Wall especially, 'cos it had cartoons on it! hammers! and airplanes! and naked people?

i remember thinking that i knew the lyrics meant things, actual things, and that lots of them seemed to be social commentary. and it was the first time i had thought about that kind of thing before. like, hey...he's calling politicians pigs! can he do that?!
that sort of thing.

The Wall was my favorite album for a long time. i still love it. i love every song. i know that most of the songs will never get radio play, and shouldn't, but i still love them. but, would i love them if i had never heard all of them? no.
i would say that, if you've never heard the whole album, you probably wouldn't like most of the songs. they would make no sense. i mean, The Trial? would suck without Hey You and Run Like Hell.

see, the problem with Pink Floyd is that you have to invest time into them. if you're not willing to do that, then you're screwed. you can go back to listening to the radio. but if you're willing to invest some time, then the awesomeness of The Wall, and Pink Floyd in general, will blow you away.

The Wall (the album) is great, but it would probably help to see The Wall (the movie). it's not the greatest movie, okay? but i'm sure you sat through one or three of the Lord of the Rings movies, m'kay? so don't be all, "eh, but it's too long." because, yes, it is long, and it gets boring in parts (like every scene with Frodo), but just watch it. it makes the album easier to listen to, 'cos it's like, "oh yeah, and here's the part where..."

so okay, you don't have time to listen to albums and watch movies. fine. then might i suggest getting one of their live albums? The Delicate Sound of Thunder or Pulse, both are fabulous. you can even get them on video. they're like greatest hits albums, only live. and they sound great. because if there's one thing those guys are into it's sound. i think they must be technology junkies, you know? because even back in the '70s their albums sounded great. and it was like, not only were they into recording themselves but...what else could they record? hey! here's a car! and here's a pig! ha! alarm clocks! let's put them on the album. okay! but in STEREO! this is going to FREAK OUT SOME GIRL WHO'S LISTENING TO THIS ALL BY HERSELF WITH THE HEADPHONES ON! HA HA!

or it's going to freak out some adult woman who was listening to One of These Days while she was all alone in her scary haunted house and she forgot to turn the volume down and when the voice came on she screamed and clutched her chest and said, "damn, justin would be laughing his ass off if he saw that."

and the band isn't just musical. they are artists as well. their album covers, videos, and concerts attest to that. their live shows are amazing: lasers, video screens, lights, explosions, giant pigs...it's grand! no kidding, the show i saw back in '95 is STILL imbedded into my brain. i mean, at one point, this giant disco ball comes out of the middle of the arena (not the stage. this thing was in the middle of the crowd.) and it...opens up...and there's a bazillion pin-points of light all over the crowd...and then? and THEN? the things starts to barely spin. so these pinpricks of light start moving slightly...and it's like...everyone's stomach had the same reaction, "oh god, am i moving? is that me?!" incredible.

amazing lyrics, amazing sound, amazing music, amazing live shows. what more could you ask for?

of course, maybe i was predisposed to like Pink Floyd. dad (who was in to airbrush at the time) painted my "nursery" to look like the cover of the Dark Side album. black walls.
in the baby's room.
completely normal.

here's ten (9) songs you need (that you probably won't hear on the radio):

10. One of These Days from Meddle but get the live version from The Delicate Sound of Thunder because it rocks.

9. Pigs (Three Different Ones) from Animals

8. Shine on You Crazy Diamond from Wish You Were Here

7. High Hopes from The Division Bell

6. there is no number 6

5. Run Like Hell from The Wall

4. Time from Dark Side of the Moon

3. Eclipse from Dark Side of the Moon

2. Sorrow from A Momentary Lack or Reason but get the live version from Pulse. it's awesome.

1. Learning to Fly from A Momentary Lapse of Reason

next epitomb: stem cell research

jaimie "by the way, which one's Pink?" pickle