12.20.06

Category: dribblings

hi guys!

look, i feel like a heel for not sharing the good news sooner, right? but i wasn’t sure if i was allowed to discuss it before it actually actually happened. otherwise, honestly i would’ve shared the awesome news with YOU first. really. even at the risk of jinxing the whole thing. but by now i’m sure you’ve already heard the awesome, amazing news:

i’m Time’s Person of the Year .

i know, i know. i feel like an ass about the whole thing, and i really didn’t believe they’d go ahead with it, you know? but they did! and when i got my issue in the mail today i couldn’t help but laugh at how awesome i am. roxy was all, “jaimie, you dolt. that’s a picture of me. I’M the person of the year!”
and i was all, “you CAN’T be person of the year, you fool. you’re a DOG.”
and she was all, “what’s that got to do with it? george w. bush won it one year…and he’s an ass.”
“good point. but as you can see…this is OBVIOUSLY a really bad picture of me, drunk at the bowling alley…and apparently i had one long eye at the time. duh.”
and she was all, “oh, you’re right.”

anyway, sorry for not telling you sooner. but like i said i didn’t want to jinx it! love!

go me! right? i mean, YES! this is SO going to look awesome on my resumé.

***

r3c3nt txt msgs:

i’m layin on the beach, bitches!
-kelly

i jsut heard my voice on the radio!
-leetle brather

i’d call you but you’ve wounded my phone’s feelings so deeply that it refuses to dial your number. you’re right, it’s fucking useless. see you at 6.
-lizz
(she left that after i left her a voicemail ranting about how she never has her phone with her and it’s a total waste of money for her to even HAVE a cell phone. it surprizes me that she’s still my friend sometimes. cos let’s face it, i’m an ass.)

ultrasound showed a very tiny penis!
-laura

yehhh….Jackie
-cookie

Angie had her baby- csection – Lyla Paige 8lbs 5oz and she’s so beautiful! and I’m pretty sure she’s a genius too…
-cookie

Crazy margaret!
-Chris

mele kelekee muckah, mutha fuckah
-leetle brather

you gotta mouth like a truckah mutha fuckah
-leetle brather

Rrrrr she blows
-suzie

Party like it’s 1999
-suzie

***

this just in:
kelly called (and then tinely right after) the Sports Page (local dive) is on fire. big flames.

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