11.01.06

Category: dribblings

tonight! we knit!

today! we work.

last night! we ate, drank, and were merry!

***

i have to tell you guys something. and quite frankly, it’s shocking as hell. i was watching an old Lynard Skynard concert on VH1 Classics the other day (aka Televison Crack Cocaine) and it was the last song, “Free Bird”, of course, when jimmy came in the room. anyway, i usually cry if i hear “Free Bird”, and not for the same reason that everybody else cries either, not from overplay, but because it reminds me of “old times” and “fond memories” and “other such mawkish sentiments that my cold stone heart remembers”. mostly it reminds me of my brother and i really miss him a lot even though i can talk to him on the phone any time.

ANYway, jimmy didn’t know who the band was on TV.
wait, what?
i know. he DID attend high school IN Alabama! he’s lived here all his life! and it’s not like he was raised by a pack of wild dogs because even wild dogs from Alabama know who the hell Lynard Skynard is.
i said, “i’ll give you a hint, they sang “Sweet Home Alabama”.” (“der,” as Cookie would say.)
he looked puzzled.

WHAT?!  hello?! SWEET HOME ALABAMA?!

“um, is it Alabama?”

“you mean to tell me, that you think that Alabama, sang “Sweet Home Alabama”?”

“i’ve heard them sing it before.”

“dude, i’ve heard Tori Amos sing “Sweet Home Alabama” and no sorry, there’s only one group. the one that WROTE it. are you putting me on?”

“are you sure it’s not Alabama?”

“are you doing this on purpose?! is this like when Liz acts like ZZ Top ISN’T one of the GREATEST POWER TRIOS OF ROCK HISTORY just to get me upset and foamy at the mouth?”

“i like ZZ Top.”

“jimmy, honey, sweetie, baby, tell me who sang “Sweet Home Alabama”. i know you’ve heard the song. they play it after EVERY ‘bama game. darling, love, tell me.”

“i don’t know.”

“wow, it’s like i don’t even know who you are. this could be grounds for divorce. it’s Lynard Skynard.”

“oh.”

“oh? oh? oh as in, “oh yeah, that’s right! total brain fart!” or oh as in, “oh, i’ve heard of them.” or is it the dreaded, “oh, i’ve heard of him.” no wait, don’t tell me which one, i’m going to pretend it’s the “right” one so that i’ll be able to sleep next to you tonight.”

who IS this man i married?

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