9.04.06

Category: dribblings


it’s true. we are now mr. and mrs. fleegan! i’m an old married hag now.

i can only assume that hell is in the process of freezing over and that the four horsemen are saddling up their death steeds to bring along the apocalypse. i hope you’ve been stocking up water supplies and have your escape plan ready.

*** 

we stayed at this fancy hotel in chattanooga called the Read House. it was tres glammy fancy. when we got to the room the porter guy was unloading our bags from the rolly cart and he set down mr. fleegan’s toiletries bag a little too hard and something started buzzing.

“is that your cell phone?” i asked.

“no. i don’t-“

“what the hell? what is that? is that in your bag?”

the porter looked uncomfortable as he stood there waiting for his tip that jimmy was getting out of his wallet as i continued to wonder about the sound.

“geez, that’s loud what is that? IS THAT A VIBRATOR?!”

the porter took his money and ran.

“no, i think it’s my electric shaver. the button must’ve been hit on something.”

“oh. hee! that dude totally has a story now!”

“wow. and we’ve only been here five minutes.”

***

“hey, i just heard that the Crocodile Hunter died.”

“no kidding?”

“nope. you wanna guess how?”

“i’m gonna go out on a limb here and say…crocodile?”

“nope. stingray.”

“no shit? that’s odd.”

“yep.”

“does that count as “natural” causes?”

“that’s cold.”

“two words buddy: snack cracker.”

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