Oh, positive.

Category: dribblings

The last two times I tried to give blood I was turned away, once in May and again on Monday. I feared the worst: Gypsy blood.

Actually I was just a bit anemic. But it is so disappointing to me to work up the courage to go donate and then get there, they jab my fingers, one on each hand, then tell me I can’t give. Because let me tell you, the finger pricking part is the part I hate the most. Not that the other part is a blast or anything. It’s just the finger tips are so sensitive, you know?

So there was one more blood drive in my area this week and I thought maybe I’d try one more time.  During the physical the lady pricked my finger and: no go. She asked if I wanted to try the other hand. I almost said no, but I thought what the heck? She sent a guy in to do the other one: KAPOW. I’m in.

This time I promised myself I WOULD NOT under ANY circumstances look at my arm, the tube full of blood, or the bag that was filling up with my blood. Also, I sipped on juice while I was donating instead of wating till I felt light-headed. It could not have gone smoother. I didn’t get grossed out, queasy, or faint. When it was over I hopped off the table like a pro and finished my juice while eating a Luna bar I had brought (gluten-free) cos I knew eating pretzels was right out.

I am O’po the Blood Queen. Suck it, minions.

I almost passed out after I got home. I loaded the dishwasher and took a baking dish across the street cos I thought mom would need it for dinner tonight. When I got inside I thought, “Why am I so out of breath?” Then I had the roaring sound in my ears that means You’re About to Hit It. So I laid down on the floor and thought, “Why didn’t you just go home and lay on the couch and take it easy like a normal person?”

DO NOT QUESTION O’PO THE BLOOD QUEEN, JAIMIE.

The blood drive was at the sheriff’s department. There was one deputy who fainted, and I felt so bad for him because everyone gave him a cup of fresh hell about it. They were so mean.

IN OTHER NEWS:

O’po the Blood Queen got new tires on her Jeep! Boosh. The old tires were 10 years old, and kinda bald. The new tires are bigger and wider and the Jeep looks a bit different. The day after I got new tires my left blinker stopped working. Dammit, Jeep, let’s not start any more bullshit, okay?

File this blog post under: First World Problems, Spoiled American Pigdog, and O’po the Blood Queen.

 

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