Grands

Category: dribblings

When I  was growing up my grandparents always lived in other states. One set was in Tampa and my mom’s dad lived in Akron. We were kind of in the middle. Because of location we saw our grandparents once a year, sometimes once every two years, and eventually, we didn’t see them that often. So my grandparents, though I loved them, were really more like acquaintances. I knew them but I was never really familiar with them. And when they died I was sad, but to be honest I didn’t feel the loss.

My two best friends, Laura and Liz, both have grandmothers, and over the many years I’ve known them, they’ve been nice enough to let me borrow their grandmas, GJ and MommieAnn. And it’s great because it’s like cheating (lifehack, LBC?). Since I’m not the granddaughter there’s no expectation from me, so when I show up with a milkshake at their house (or hospital room) I’m golden. If I visit and do a couple of chores, I’ve hung the moon. So I go over, let them chat about whatever the hell old ladies chat about, and they feel good cos they’ve had a visit and I feel good because hey, old people appreciate a visit.

These last few months have been bad news for grandmas though. MommieAnn passed away, and now GJ is being moved to Florida to live near her son. Her mind has gone and she can’t take care of herself anymore. All day I thought about going by her house to say goodbye to her, but I chickened out. This evening I was visiting Laura and Kris and Kris was going to GJ’s house to pick up her dog so I tagged along to say goodbye. She recognized me, most of the time, and for that I’m thankful. I got to hug her neck and say goodbye. It was the first time I’ve said goodbye to someone and meant it. I can’t remember another time when I knew I’d never see that person again. It has made me so much sadder than I thought it would.

Laura, Liz, thank you for sharing your grandmas with me.

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