bugbite3

Category: dribblings

bugbite3 by fleegan.com
bugbite3, a photo by fleegan.com on Flickr.

Yes. It is gross. This is day 5 of mystery bite.

On day 3 I went to the doctor and he gave me antibiotics to take and told me to scrub the bite with a toothbrush 3 times a day. I brush it, and it bleeds. It is gross and hurts, but it’s not that bad, and it would be a lot better if it wasn’t also covered up with poison ivy. I AM SO GOOD AT YARDWORK.

Today Flippy said that I had not cleaned out the wound good enough. Shreddy agreed. I told them that I couldn’t get all the brown/black stuff out because it is under the skin and it’s not like the doctor would want me to break my skin open to get it out. The doc just said to scrub it with a toothbrush 3 times a day.

“Jaimie, that’s exactly what he’d want you to do!”

“With what? I scrub it with a toothbrush!”

“How hard?”

“REALLY hard.”

“Do you bleed?”

“Yes!”

“Well it’s not good enough. Do you have any tequila?”

“Wha- yeah, you wanna do a shot?”

“No, but you do a shot and I’ll clean it out.”

So I got some soap, toothbrush, washcloth, and I slugged down some tequila straight out of the bottle, like a pro. I don’t recommend that you try this at home. I’d recommend that you not get bit by an evil bug.

Shreddy is an office manager at a doctor’s office, so she’s the most qualified to scrub out a wound (hurt me.) And that she did.

By the time she had cleaned it out I had an even bigger hole in my arm and I was sweating bullets. Throughout the process I yelled at her a lot and also laughed (probably from the tequila), but I have to admit, it looks better even if it is constantly oozing. I’m not sure what the black thing that came out of the bite was, but I’m telling people it was a snake fang.

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