Opo, the Blood Douche

Category: dribblings

I tried to donate blood yesterday and they (once again) would not take my gypsy blood because it was anemic or something lame like that. So I texted a pal about it and she was all, “It’s called a multi vitamin. You take one every day. YOU’RE WELCOME.” Which translates to, “If this happens again and you haven’t been taking a vitamin everyday I swear to God you better not bitch to ME about it.”
Fair enough.

I was at Walmart (not bragging, just not shopping at The Smug Grocery Store) and checked out the vitamins and decided right there I wasn’t going to be taking a giant vitamin everyday. Nay, not when there are STILL Flintstones vitamins to be had. Okay honestly, the 8 year-old inside of me was all, “Dude! Get the Flintstones! Flintstones!” and while you probably shouldn’t let the 8 year-old you make any kind of medical decisions, I figure vitamin choice isn’t that big of a deal. (Now that I’m thinking about it, I’m not sure Me at any age makes good medical decisions.) Anyway, 8 year-old me is like, a really smart 8 year-old okay? Let her have the Flintstones.

Plus! They have Flintstone GUMMI vitamins! But the joke is on you, Jaimie, cos the gummi ones don’t have iron in them, and that’s what you need, so you have to buy the old crunchy kind. So see, there’s a smart choice, yes, get the Flintstones, but only the crunchy kind cos that’s got the junk in it that I need.
You would never know I went to college and everything.

It’s nice to see that some things never change. Flintstones vitamins are still the same shapes, although I have not run across a Dino yet. And they have the exact same taste that you remember from 1983, fruit pennies, I believe is the flavor.

Do kids know who the Flintstones are? I mean, these vitamins are marketed for them, right? Not for stupid 36 year-olds. But I don’t think they are on TV anymore, are they? So how would they know that the BEST ones are Dino and The Car?

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