1.24.06

Category: dribblings

you won’t believe this. and hell, i don’t blame you for not believing this, but since i live it, i know it’s true.i was talking with dad this morning (he helped me do the Leather Wall. which, by the way, SHOULD be what the blog is about today. but no. THIS is.) and i told him how Hobo John had kinda freaked out on me yesterday. so he says, “that guy sounds like a weirdo. you should check out that website Tinley told us about.”
he was refering to

www.familywatchdog.us which is a site that lets you locate local sex offenders.
“oh dad,” i said, “sure he’s weird, but he really seems kinda harmless in a simpleton kind of way. total Lenny.”
“well, i don’t like him coming around your house like that.”
“yeah, i guess he’s usually walking to his house. he told me he lives on Peachtree….oh shit. Tinley told me that she went to that site and said that there was a sex offender living on Peachtree!”
“you’re kidding me!”
“no i’m not. let’s go to my house at lunch and check out that site.”
so we get to the house and look up Gadsden and i swear, the first green dot i click…”oh no…oh hell.”
“is that Hobo John?!”
sigh. “yes. shit.”so what i thought was just an

oogy retard crush has turned into something a little more worrisome. on the one hand, he only comes around about once a month and he’s never tried to touch me or anything. on the other, more sinister hand, each time he comes around it’s gotten progressively more weird (see yesterday’s post).and just what is up with this anyway? did i move to Crazyville? i feel like i’m the only normal person in the ‘hood. am i mayor of Crazyville? i don’t know. i don’t know. but what i do know is that i’m actually considering getting a gun. ME! a gun! no! i don’t want a gun! i don’t want to feel safe because i have a gun! i want to feel safe because i’m safe. does that make sense? am i asking too much? “more than a lot?” (hee, for you, liz.)

anyway, i don’t actually know what to do about it. i guess next time he pops up i gotta tell him to go away, but honestly, he’s only ever popped up when i’m all alone and if you think for one second that i’m going to tell a slightly volatile retard pervert (i am so PC) who has a weird crush on me to go away and never come near me again, well, you are sorely mistaken, i am a total coward. and i do not want to say anything that’s going to set him off.
my bad, i know. but he’s giagantic and it wouldn’t take much for him to be all, “hobo john, smash!” yuck, the Incredible Lenny. “tell me about the rabbits, george, or i’ll get angry. and you wouldn’t like me when i’m angry.”

i’m probably being a big baby drama queen about the whole thing, right?
right?

ugh, we need something to cheer this blog up. hey look!

try not to think about goddamn perverts living down the street!

aw, pandas. pandas will take away these blah feelings of worry and unsafeness! aw, and look at these wittle guys.

these little guys will keep you from thinking that the pervert lives two blocks from the local high school. fuck. 

 

Tags:

No Comments