8.11.05
Category: dribblings
i didn’t get paid for the job i finished because the lady had an emergency to take care of. i know that she’s good for the moeny and i have no reason at all to believe she’s trying to rip me off. it’s just a little inconvenient.
the AC Man is coming back on monday to put in a new thermostat. we’ll see if that helps anything. i mean, i know i need a new one…i’m just not sure that that is the main reason that the damn thing isn’t working like a normal ac unit. at any rate, i’m thinking that it won’t cost any more than $100, if that. so, till monday: wonky AC.
but i’ll take “wonky” over “completely broken” any day.
so when i get home from work (after finding out No Money) and walk in the warm house i’m all, “i’m going to mow the lawn. that way, my yard will look so good and i can be satisfied with something. i’m going to be proactive, by god!”
whilst mowing i stepped in FRESH cat shit.
my cat is an inside cat now, so i know it wasn’t Toonces Whorecat. it was from one of Lola’s Sex Spying Cats. there are two of them. one looks like Nibbler Woodlayson, and the other looks like a big, poofy, ugly, blackish cat that i’ve taken to calling Yvonne Mandlebaum. but only in my head, because when i say anything to those cats out loud it’s usually, “GET! yerass off my lawn.” as i point at them mercilessly.
so the whole time i’m mowing i’m all, “why do i smell shit?”
eventually it hits me. i look down and say, “jaimie, you’ve got shit all over BOTH shoes. it’s cat killin’ time.”
i guess i’m going to have to start chasing the bastards out of the yard more consistently. i’d get a pellet gun, but i’d end up shooting out a window or someone’s car. and i don’t want to go to jail. but the thought of shooting these cats fills me with glee. it might be different if they weren’t feral city cats. maybe then i’d be all, “oh, those darn cats.” in fact, i’m not sure lola remembers to feed them everyday. but it doesn’t matter ‘cos i’m sure that there’s plenty of rats they can kill. in fact, i’ve been wondering if that’s why i haven’t had much of a rat problem recently. it’s probably those cats…and the 9,000 boxes of poison i’ve put out.
they come into my yard
A. because (according to Crazy Margaret) Lola told them to and
B. they like to try to catch the fish in That Goddamn Fish Pond.
so far, the fish are winning. and all this time i thought fish were stupid. well, maybe they are, but these asshole fish are holding their own so…good for them.
anyway, long story short: Hell Month continues. no money and shit on my shoes.
tomorrow i’m not leaving the house.
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