Category: dribblings

i usually have more willpower than this. in situations such as these, i’m the Asshole Voice of Reason. so what i want to know is…wha’ happened?

as you might’ve read on Laura’s blog, i adopted a dog from the local Humane Society. i would like to blame my parents, but really, i was the one who drove back, by myself, after purchasing $45 worth of food, treats, and toys, and shelled out $55 for the “adoption”.
i blame myself, mostly.

mom and dad wanted me to get the border collie because they love those dogs, they’ve had three. but i’m not too keen on them because it seems that they are either really smart or really retarded, they’ve had one smart one. so dad and i go to get the border collie out and all the dogs are going wild, except this large dog, who is just standing there all, “these aren’t the dogs you’re looking for.” we get the border collie, Oreo, out and she goes about 90 miles an hour ’round and ’round the fenced in area. holy crap! she’s two years old, which i was excited about ‘cos i thought, ‘well, at least she’s got all of her puppying out of the way.’ very sweet, but hyper dog. the humane society calls it “playful”.

“dad, i really want to check out that huge dog.”
“i know, it’s stupid, but yeah.”
“well, she keeps looking over the fence at us. and it’s not stupid, you have a huge yard.”

and it was true. while we were watching Oreo run like a loon, i’d look over at the back of the cages, and i’d see the tip-top of her head and just her eyes as she would prop up on the fence. aw.

so we got her out, she was Roxy. she was huge and only 6 months meaning, still growing, you idiot. but she was so sweet and personable and sweet and huge and sweet and loving and sweet. and she, like Oreo, was one of the dogs that had been trained by the prisoners. which, i think that program (the prisoners training dogs) is a GREAT program. it benefits…everyone. Vicki, the lady who runs the Humane Society, told me that they started doing it for the big dogs to make them more adoptable. ‘cos usually people want to adopt puppies and the big dogs get the shaft. or needle i guess?

but honestly, i didn’t plan on getting any dog. i just went to humor mom and dad.

and dad was all, “you don’t have to get one now. you can think about it over the weekend and go back monday or something.”
“i know. but wouldn’t it make sense to get one today so that i’d have all weekend to see how she’s going to adjust? ‘cos i’ll have to work all week and i wouldn’t get to see her until the evenings and-”
“yeah, you’re right. you’re going to get Roxy aren’t you?”
“no! yes. shit. fuck. no! no no nonononono!”

so now, $100 later, i’ve got a dog. a huge dog.
huge dog=huge poop.

she’s so big i’m worried that when she finally gets bored that she’ll jump the fence because there’s two spots (2 corners) that have been built up with RRties and made into planters (so stupid. the dirt is ROCK HARD) so she can jump on them and then jump on out.

i don’t think i would have ever named a dog Roxy, but it’s really cute and she is a rockstar, so there.

Roxy chased off one of Lola’s feral cats this morning. YES! good dog! however, this is going to confuse her when she finally meets Toonces Whorecat and is yelled at for barking and chasing her. although, honestly, i think Toonces can handle Roxy herself. there may be some bloodshed, but it won’t be Toonce.

Roxy is an outside dog but will have inside priviledges. in fact, you’ll be happy to know that because i’m such a heartless pet owner, on her first night, she stayed outside all night long. jimmy thought i would cave in. but no! haimie is strict! leesten, ju are just a dog, ogay? ju just need to run around and make barky-bark at people who walk by, ogay? and keel those feral gatos.

today i plan on taking Roxy to mom and dad’s house to play with Blue Dog and Dude. she rides well in the jeep and she’s really good on a leash too! i’m telling ya, the prisoners training dogs thing is great!


Popsicle and Kevin the Plumber came by this morning and brought a giant doghouse*. Kevin is a Rockstar plumber, so if any of you locals need some plumbing call me and i’ll give ya his number ‘cos he is not only good looking, he is also very reasonable in price. and he doesn’t act like plumbing is this complicated thing, when he fixes something he explains it to you.
i make him sound like a hooker.
wow, can he lay some pipe.

*d’oh! the doghouse was Bosco’s house. Bosco is Best’s dog. i bought my house from Best. meaning: it seems like she moved the doghouse for nothing since we basically just brought it back here! and it’s a pain to move that thing because it’s SO BIG and HEAVY that the only way to get it in is to take part of my fence down.


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